Recently, I’ve been reading through the book, 642 Things to Write About. I bought it a couple years ago, thinking it would be a quick way to capture some new ideas for writing. Oddly enough, the following topic spoke to me. I’m not sure what this says about me. Ok, yes, I do. I have my issues. We all do. Here are mine.
What won’t you touch with a 10-foot pole?
Worms – I tried to read How to Eat Fried Worms when I was a kid, and ever since, the sight of worms makes my stomach turn. Rainy days on a paved driveway are painful.
Olives – Satan, himself, grows these in hell.
Dandelion stems – I learned (the hard way) that they can create perfectly round dark circles on light coloured clothing and you can never tell they are there until after the clothing has gone through the dryer. They’re like the freaking crop circles of the laundry room.
Climbing the professional ladder – I am incredibly happy in my current position and have no interest leaving the (kindergarten) classroom. Now that being said, if I was given the opportunity to rule my portion of the world for a day, I may need to take a leave of absence from my current position.
A syringe – Biggest. Phobia. Of. My. Life. No. Pride. Left. In fact, if I don’t change the topic quickly enough here, I may pass out (that’s an entirely different blog post…list the various places where I have passed out…and just a heads up, cement is not always your friend).
Plastic vampire teeth – Just looking at them make my teeth sore. In fact, thinking about them right now, makes my gums ache. I am getting better in this area though. Even real wiggly teeth used to make me cringe. Teaching Kindergarten has helped me with this.
Cigarettes – I was only slightly tempted in grad school because you have to have some kind of vice when you are in grad school. Now that I think of it, my real vice in grad school was licor….ice. Seriously, I really should have dedicated my thesis to red licorice.
Royalty – If I touch any of them with a pole, I am most likely going to spend the night in jail. I suppose I would find out the hard way if there is such a thing as a castle dungeon.
Boiled icing recipe – I refuse to learn how to make it for fear that I would spread it on my toast every morning for breakfast. And then I would be late(r) for work every day because who can leave boiled icing left over in the fridge? Another piece of toast, anyone?
Down hill skiing – I’ve said for a while now that my personal version of hell would be for me to be forced to downhill ski all day. And each time, I finally made it to the bottom of the hill, I would have to eat a bottle of olives. And yes, I know, I live just around the corner from the slopes.
Ok, so there you have it, folks. That’s my current list. In time, I’m sure I could find some more items to add to this list. And in the meantime, maybe I’ll make a list of items that I wouldn’t touch with a shorter pole.